Recently, we had an episode with my son, and we sort of left him outside at night. Of course we made sure the gates were locked and we kept him within our sight. Here goes:
One night, about two weeks ago, upon coming back home from an 'open house', I really needed the ladies', so I rushed into the house leaving my husband to deal with Mika. Mika refused to come out of the car and refused to have my husband carry him in. He said he wanted me. So my husband got the other stuff into the house first, and when he got back to the boy, Mika still refused to come out on his own or be carried. Still, my hubby carried him out but he struggled with my hubby. He still insisted on me going out to get him! My son can be really stubborn when he wants to and I was not appropriately dressed to go outside. So I was like telling my hubby to go get him. My hubby though, got so ticked off with Mika that he threatened Mika that he either came in or Daddy closed the door. Since Mika didn't budge from where he stood and crying, my hubby turned on the porch light, and closed the door.
After about half a minute, I opened the door, called to him but he kept saying, "I want Mommy to carry."
I said, "Why do you want Mommy to carry you? Why don't you walk here? Come, baby. Come in."
He simply continued to cry and waited there for me to come out and carry him.
Finally, I took a square basket, lined it with a pillow, and pushed it out the door, "Here, if you don't want to come in, you can sleep outside in this basket. Are you coming in or not?"
Haha, finally he came in, still crying. He saw that I was serious. I held his hand and walked with him to the sofa. Then I carried him to my lap and hugged the silly boy.
"Silly boy, Mommy sayang(i.e., Mommy love you). Why didn't you want to come in by yourself?
He hugged me back and then fell asleep.
"Silly boy," I said to the sleeping child.
Now, thinking about it, I think I know why he kept insisting on me to carry him though when my husband asked me why the other night, I said, "I dunno!"
When we were out visiting, I asked my son to 'salaam' (something culturally similar to a handshake) and he refused to do it. (BTW, I finally got my 5yo to 'salaam' though I can't remember what I promised her in return for her to 'salaam' people forever but I know i've fulfilled that promise coz if I hadn't, I'll never hear the end of it from my girl.)
Anyway, since he wasn't wearing slippers, when he asked me to carry him back to the car, I told him, "Ask Daddy. Don't expect Mommy to carry you after that horrible display of behaviour." So I guess that was his way of getting back attention from me.
Sigh, it's sure not easy being a parent. But that doesn't give a person the license to be a vindinctive parent.
Were we too strict? I dunno. All I know is that my hubby and I should be a united front coz no matter what, he's still the child and not the boss of us. Giving in to him would have just given him the upper hand and the knowledge that he can simply cry until he gets his way.